July 5, 2016

The Reality of the Mom-Bod

Body image is always a hot topic to talk about. And no one person is privy to it. I won’t sugar coat this or pretend I’ve always been self-conscious about my body. Because I haven’t. I was proud of my body for a long time. Going through college and shortly after, I looked the best I ever did. I was naturally super thin, never had to work out. I had curves in all the right places (expect my boobs. I never had boobs.) However, the fact of the matter is the older we get, our bodies change. I started getting mom-hips even before I became a mom. And then when I got pregnant, I was fully prepared to blow up like a tick everywhere.

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I clearly thought I was hot shit doing photo shoots, circa 2011. (photo by Derek Soter)

But I didn’t. I ended up being all belly. In fact, 3 months into my pregnancy and I weighed less than I did before getting pregnant (thank you, morning sickness!) Regardless, there is still something that makes you feel not like yourself when you are pregnant. I started feeling lazy and gross. I felt like I looked like a slob. And while I knew deep down I certainly did not look the way I felt, it didn’t help any. I began getting super lazy, a little down on myself, and my sex drive plummeted (sorry, Tim!)   After having my son, I felt great! I kept getting so many compliments with how people couldn’t believe I just had a baby a few days ago. It made me feel awesome. While what was underneath the clothing didn’t look great, I still felt like myself again. And breast feeding…it’s the ultimate workout! I felt so pretty. Skinny and my boobs were huge! When I decided to stop breast feeding after a few months is when I felt the effects of being a mom. I gained about 15-20 lbs within weeks. All of my pre-pregnancy jeans that I was so proud to fit into after the baby no longer fit me. All my dress pants for work were too tight. Bathing suit season was just around the corner and I didn’t even have time to eat dinner most nights, let alone join a gym.   This weekend at all the Fourth of July cookouts we went to, I couldn’t help but look at the girls wearing bikinis, some of which who had a child a year ago and looked the best she had in her life. I didn’t understand why I couldn’t get myself there. The thought of eating well and going to gym seemed exhausting, but I wanted to feel good like I did before Cooper.   It was then my husband reminded me of something. I just had a baby! All this pressure I was feeling to look perfect, and like I had never had children…and I JUST had a baby. Five months ago, to be exact. It started to make me think. We read these tabloids about the freak of nature Kardashian sisters who have baby after baby and look like a swimsuit model two weeks later. We think there is something wrong with us. No! The Kardashians are not reality! They are surgically modified and medicated to look that way.   I then remembered an Instagram post I saw from Jessie James Decker last year, and it's why I believe she is a role model to young girls and women. In October 2015, Jessie posted a photo on Instagram of her post-partum belly after having her second child, with this message. 

"I appreciate all of the sweet comments about how tiny I look after baby! But I don't want to mislead any mommy's who just had babies and are stressing! I gained 55 pounds with my daughter and only 27 this time! I gained so much with her because I threw up every day for five months and of course was starving after so I would shove anything in my mouth to make that hunger feeling go away. This time I ate very normal and would take occasional walks. I am still 15 pounds away from what I was originally before I got pregnant with Vivianne. I take occasional walks but haven't done anything yet to try and lose weight and am in no rush! Nursing mamas should def not try and do any severe diets or milk supply will run low! My tummy is still swollen and you can see my c-section scar and pooch! I had another due to my 9lb baby and petite frame. So no rushing and no stressing about losing weight! Wanted to make sure y'all saw what my tummy looks like under the tank top and blazer...I do wear a belly waist train thingy a few hours here n there which helps c section mamas and swelling to go down. I am so glad we all can support each other. Being a mommy is so rewarding but hard work so we need to stick together and help each other out. I'm not perfect but I do my best. That's what it's all about. So never be hard on yourself. I'm going to try and do more posts like this. So feel free to ask anything below and will try and incorporate it in another mommy post! <3 y'all”

JJD Post 

Even one of the most beautiful women ever had a mom-pooch. Just like me. So why am I so worried about it? We read about all these celebs and “how they got their body back” so quickly. But did they really? Or did a plastic surgeon give it back to them? And maybe they did do it naturally, but my guess is they have eight nannies helping to raise their child in the meantime. Because honestly, I can’t understand how it’s possible otherwise.   I am not trying to discredit any woman who truly works their butt off to get their body back to where it was quickly. If you can do that naturally, I praise you! But it sucks. Hollywood has made us feel like we should be ashamed if we don’t look perfect after having a child. The reality is I am tired. I work full time. I am home alone most nights due to me and my husband working opposite schedules (he works second shift). Most nights, I order take out. My house is a disaster. And I’m lucky if I get to brush my hair in the morning, let alone put on make-up. The only time I could possibly work out is during my lunch hour at work, and I’ll be honest…I’m starving at that point. Yes. I like to eat. A lot. So, I’m all done feeling sorry for myself and wishing I had the perfect body. I don’t. And I might not ever again. But I have a beautiful son, a husband that loves me for exactly what I am and I know I’m a good mom. That’s all that really matters. <3


If you don't already, you should totally follow Mrs. James Decker. She is honestly the realest, down to Earth celeb I've seen in a long time. She is always posting adorable photos of her kids, her gorgeous husband, and her cute fashion line, Kittenish.

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